Sometime in February, 1982

FUCK MY MOTHER AND KEVIN. FUCK THEM! I'm pissed. I'm so frustrated now because I can't express my anger. I'm so angry! Why did this have to happen? Oh God why me! If I can't concentrate on my term paper I'm going to kill! I'm going to kill! I'm going to kill myself! Oh do I want to die! Oh do I wnat to be thin! Oh am I fat! Oh do I have a lot of work to do on my term paper. My mother is mad at me because I don't want to be taken out of school but so many things are coming up then and she thinks I'm stupid! Kevin yelled at me because I got angry at her for thinking I was stupid so are are both sons of bitches. She just came into my room to ask me what I wanted from the store. I want Dutch Cocoa cookies and milk. Does anyone care about Tricia? No, of course not Patricia! You should really know better than that! Really. All I want is to graduate from Vail-Deane, got to Sarah Lawrence, become a great and famous writer, have 20 kids, get a doctorate, be happily married, rich, own a lot of perperty, and have my friends always! My mother can go to hell. Kevin can got to HELL too.

*****

The next day,

THEY ARE STILL ANGRY. THEY ARE DRIGIN ME CRAZY AND i CAN'T TAKE IT I CAN'T! I SWEAR I CAN'T! I SWEAR I CAN'T! I'M SO DEPRESSED! MY MOTHER IS A HATEFUL, VENGEFUL PERSON! I'M SO SICK! I REALLY WANTED TO DIE. SHE DOESN'T MAKE IT EASY FOR ME. THAT BITCH SAYS I HAVE A PERSECUTION COMPLEX. YOU SEE I'M UPSET.

HOW COME NOBODY CARES ABOUT WHAT IT FEEL?